20 Things I'd Tell Early 20s (writer) Me

This post over at the Crunk Feminist Collective really resonated with me ( by the way, if you don’t follow their blog, remedy that immediately). I realized most of what I want to tell young-me related to my writing:

1. You are not a loser for wanting to stay in on a Saturday night and read.
2. Alternatively, all that going out, drinking, and dancing you’re doing is not per se irresponsible. It will give you great material for your writing down the road.
3. As a matter of fact, live as much as you can. Travel, take chances, risk your heart. You can’t be a great writer if you’ve never experienced anything.
4. All that poetry you write? Even the bad stuff? That agonizing word by word, line by line, will pay off big time. Don’t stop writing it.
5. Don’t be scared to call yourself a writer.
6. Don’t be scared to share your work. Sign up for an open mic night or a critique group. Be brave.
7. Take some classes that relate to your writing.
8. In fact, don’t buy into the whole “you need a real degree” mentality – go for your MFA, if you want.
9. But if you don’t take those classes and you don’t get that MFA*, remember – as long as you keep writing, you’ll always be a writer.
10. Those novels you started that just kind of fizzled out? Those are important. You’re figuring stuff out about your writing, things that make you unique. And when you got the idea to take the Atlanta murder mystery and rewrite it in a dystopian setting? You had no idea how ahead of the curve you were.
11. Harry Potter only gets better. It will mean as much to you in 2011 as it did in 1999.
12. Never stop believing in magic.
13. Your humanist perspective and anti-racist attitude are so important to your voice as a writer. Do not lose them as you get older. They are part of what makes you able to tell a story no one else can tell.
14. That boy who broke your heart? He’s not nearly as important as you think he is. For serious. But, on the bright side, all that angst will really help with certain scenes in the first novel you actually complete.**
15. Love the time when your friends are your world. Cherish your best friend as your first reader. You will have families of your own much sooner than you realize, and things will inevitably change.
16. But don’t be scared of change, whether it’s in your life or in your writing (editing!)
17. If a guy doesn’t go crazy over your writing, he’s not the guy for you (hint: you will meet This Guy and This Guy will totally heal the heart-wound and ego-bruise guy-who-broke-your-heart gave you when he had no reaction to the poem you wrote for him. I promise better things are coming).
18. For the love of god, realize how much time you have. Use it. relish it. Take naps and take impromptu trips to write in coffee shops. Stay up until 3am writing because you can sleep in the next day. One day you will have more kids than you can comprehend*** and one of the things you will miss most (besides having a slamming body with no working out or diet required) is your time.
19. This has nothing to do with writing, but do you have any idea how beautiful you are? Believe it.
20. You are a writer already – never give up and you will be amazed how far determination can take you.

*Spoiler alert: you’re actual going to go to law school. Surprise!

**There is a difference between “first novel you actually complete” and “first novel you feel ready to publish.” That’s okay. Put it in a drawer and come back to it when you’re older and wiser.

***Four. Four boys.